i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize