Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
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I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
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I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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