The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
