miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
