Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
