Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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