loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
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