C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
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