yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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