I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
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She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
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I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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