So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
