Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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