So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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