I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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