fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
