I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
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I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
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I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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