i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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