i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
