What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Semen is not good for contacts.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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