I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Farmville is her only friend.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
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