You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
