I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize