Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
