Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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