you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize