singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
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