is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
