So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
