I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
