Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize