Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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