I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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