my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Randomize
