You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
party gras won. party gras always wins.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
