areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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