Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
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