I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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