Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
