quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
