question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize