I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
