What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
party gras won. party gras always wins.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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