I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
