were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Randomize
