she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize