Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
