I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
