DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize