you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
