Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
