No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
