So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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